To solve the political crisis our country is facing, I have decided to be the first golfer to announce my entry into the Presidential race. Since
Ike did a pretty good job I think it is high time another golfer entered the race.
My platform:
1. As President/golfer I will handle all government required procedures in 4.5 hours or less.
2. TAX REFORM: I will give tax breaks to all golfers.
3. EDUCATION POLICY: The Golfing Machine will be required reading in all schools.
4. Air Force One will be replaced by a bullet-proof Club Car created by "Q" at MI6.
5. Whenever the President enters any vehicle it automatically becomes
Golf Force One.
6. The White House will be renamed
The Club House.
7. All Secret Service agents must have a 5.0 handicap index or lower.
8. All Marines must salute the President with a flat left wrist.
9 . Homer Kelley's birthday will be a national holiday.
10. TAX POLICY: Authorized Instructors don't pay taxes- EVER.
11. IMMIGRATION POLICY: All persons wishing to immigrate to the U.S. must be able to recite the 3 Imperatives and then take a 20 lesson series from a TGM instructor before gaining residency status.
12. G.S.E.D's (current or present) will be given Cabinet positions.
13. Golf will be the
national sport, and all TGM Instructors will be given badges that permit speeding and will have government cars will bright
yellow strobe flashers.
These are the foundation points of my Presidential platform, if you have any other suggestions please notify me using this forum or send email to:
wewantagolferforpresident@savetherepublic.com
This message brought to you by The Foundation to Get a TGM'er in The White House. I am B.J. Hathaway and I endorse this message.